Am I a bad person for thinking that if God does exist, then he's a monster?

I feel like some people just have the most painful life. I go to church & pray & do everything a Christian is supposed to do but deep down I really feel like God is very mean. I like to read the comments after a news posting ex. that certain racial populations are growing (or maybe that doctor in the news that refuse to be deployed because basically he's a bigot & hates Obama) & I just can't help thinking that God is really mean toward black people. Yes, life is hard for all & I'm fortunate to be successful person but I can't help but wonder why we have to deal with so much hatred.